it sunk in. dammit.
on thursday, at work, i was talking to Holly about how sick i’ve been feeling lately. the heart burn and reflux mainly, but also my loss of appetite, excessive need for sleep, and general not feeling quite like myself. she said that sounded like depression. i told her (i told myself) it wasn’t depression. i was over and beyond that.
maybe not so much.
i’m sick of myself. i’m sick of spending these days alone, running around to thrift stores and cafes, trying desperately to fill my time and mind with good thoughts about the simple things that cheer me up. i want friends back. i’m lonely as hell and, no matter how many phone calls i make, how many texts i send, how many attempts i make to keep in touch… it’s not enough.
what did i do wrong?
i don’t work enough for my schedule to be an issue with hang outs. i’m open and willing to do damn near anything. i always have been. i just want some human interaction.
being lonely was so much easier when i was lonely in the romantic sense. this lack of human interaction… it’s killin’ me.
Sunday, August 16, 2009
Monday, August 10, 2009
Saturday, August 1, 2009
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